Fight the fear (Dean Ambrose one shot 18)
by purdygirl96
Summary: This is a one shot for Dean Ambrose in two chapters. Dean and Abbie used to be happy before the birth of their first child. Could Dean fight his fears and bring the happiness back in their life? A very very distant sequel to "Sethie doesn't know" (Sexual content)
1. Chapter 1

**I would be very thankful if you leave some reviews, no matter good or bad. I just want to know what you guys think. ))**

Abbie sat in the rocking chair in only her bathrobe, trying hard to concentrate on her book. But she couldn't. Her thoughts were constantly going out in the past, when everything seemed to be fine, even perfect. Then she was sure that he loved her as much as she loved him. He was so sweet, so caring and even more careful with her. He tried to keep her happy in every single moment spend with that's what she was – happy in every sense of the word. He was so understandable and everything was more than perfect. But then something changed. These five months he's been not only coldhearted and distant, but it was like he was trying to avoid her. Even though they were married and shared the same home, the same bed and the same future.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the knock on the door. She slowly put her book down on the table, got up from the chair and went to open it. The first thing she saw were two sparkling eyes, staring at her.

\- Roman?

\- Hey there, beautiful – he smiled at her. – Didn't Dean tell you I was going to pass by? – She shook her head. – Well…here I am. Where is he anyways?

\- Down. In the basement. Working out. Don't just stand there – come in.

He nodded his head and stepped inside. Abbie closed the door behind him.

\- Do you want me to tell him you are here?

\- No need. I can wait. And plus I see him every day. I came to see you. I missed you. – He whispered. She had always known that Roman had feelings for her. Deep feelings. She felt bad that she didn't feel the same way. She considered him as a friend only. But these three words were the sweetest thing she had heard lately. And that was it… The moment she just couldn't take it anymore, she couldn't pretend anymore…she wasn't that strong girl anymore….She broke down into tears.

\- Hey…what's wrong? Did… did I say something wrong? – He asked as he hugged her tightly. She buried her face in his chest.

\- No, it's just…I feel so lonely lately…and…I'm all alone…and… I just… - she tried to explain.

\- Shh…calm down – Roman whispered, sitting on the rocking chair and taking her down with him, in his lap. He looked at her eyes…oh God…these beautiful golden eyes…the ones he fell in love with. He couldn't stand seeing them sad. – You are not alone. I'm here for you…Dean too. He loves you.

She shook her head, crying harder.

\- I'm not sure he loves me anymore. He is barely talking to me. He is distant. He doesn't touch me anymore. It's like I'm disgusting him. I knew that my body would change after the birth and I thought he knew it too…

\- What? – Roman asked in amazement. Dean didn't touch her anymore? Was he crazy? Roman would just give everything to be with her…even for one night. He was longing to feel her even closer to him. To be body to body with her. To touch her…or just to watch her – her body with these perfect curves. Yes, she was a bit changed. She wasn't as skinny as before. She wasn't fat. Not at all. But her stomach surely wasn't as flat as before. Her breasts were bigger now…and she was more beautiful than ever. She was perfect. – Is he crazy? Abbie, you are beautiful.

\- It's not just that. – She continued, still sobbing. – He never goes to Dea. Never holds her. It's like he doesn't want her. He doesn't love her. I don't want my little baby girl, growing up with a father that doesn't love her.

\- Shh…calm down, Abbie. – Roman whispered again, bringing her closer to his body. She placed her head on his shoulder as she continued to cry silently. He buried his face in her reddish brown hair. Her scent was intoxicating him. The thought of Dean acting like a total asshole was driving him crazy. Anger was building inside of his body. Anger that he knew it would soon develop into rage. – I'm just going to kick his ass…and it all will be fine again. – He growled in her ear.

She pulled herself back, looking into his eyes.

\- No! Promise me you won't do anything…God…I'm so sorry I'm putting you through all this drama. It's not like it will change anything. – She said, trying to calm herself a little and wiping her eyes. She just hated to act all girly. She was acting like a cry baby right now. They went silent for a while. She was slowly calming down again and he was just watching her, enjoying the few moments of intimacy with her. Yes, that was what he considered as intimacy. He usually never allowed himself to touch her…it was awkward for him since she knew how he felt.…

Another cry went through the room, but this time it was coming from the baby phone.

-Oh! Excuse me…it seems she is awake. I'm just going to bring her down.

Roman nodded as he watched Abbie getting up from his lap heading upstairs. God…he was so pissed at Dean…that he could just tear him to pieces. If he was acting that way with Abbie…with that beautiful creature…there was for sure something wrong with him.

Fifteen minutes later Abbie came back down with the little Dea in her arms. Roman stood up from the chair. Dea made a funny sound as she saw him and reached out her tiny hands for Roman. She obviously wanted him to hold her. Maybe she missed father's attention, thought Abbie. The big guy smiled down at the baby, taking the little girl from her mother's arms.

\- Hey there, princess. God…she is so beautiful. She has your nose – he chuckled. Abbie smiled and nodded.

\- The only thing she got from me. She looks so much like Dean. She has his eyes and his hair color. – She smiled as she run her hand over her daughters head, making her blondish hair even messier. – Come on; let's put you in your high chair… You know… I changed her diaper and fed her…now that she's all good, she can just seat in her baby chair with hours.

Abbie giggled as she put her daughter in the baby chair.

\- She's perfect. You really did a great job, Abbie. – Roman said as he went closer to her, looking straight into her eyes. – I don't know what's gotten into Dean, but he surely misses a lot by avoiding you. If I had the chance to have you for myself every day and every night, I would never let you go.

\- Oh…Roman…. – she whispered, placing her hand on his cheek. He could just see the sorrow in her eyes. He knew that she was going to reject him, but he couldn't keep it in anymore. He placed his hands on her waist and brought her closer to him. Her body pressing into his. He leaned in and captured her lips with his. They were so soft and so gentle…he could stay like this forever. He was surprised that she kissed him back. He wasn't going to pull away anytime soon, even if his oxygen wasn't enough…he just wasn't going to pull away. He at least knew that he could die a happy man now. He tried to bring her even closer. He wanted to untie her bathrobe….God….was she naked underneath….God…He would take her right then and there, without even thinking twice.

A slight cough somewhere in the background made them pull apart.

\- Dean…


	2. Chapter 2

Dean spend the whole day down in the basement, just working out. Right now he was hitting the punching bag with as much force as he had. He was so pissed mostly at himself. He knew he was a jerk…total asshole. He had gorgeous wife and beautiful daughter…God…he was a horrible person… he hated himself for what he was doing to her. Dean knew that Abbie was suffering… She was all alone all day…with the baby… with no social contacts or anything…

But he was just afraid…afraid of being a bad father. With a childhood tragedy there was just no other way. He was sure that instead of growing up with a father like him, it was better for his girl to grow up without a father at all. So he decided to keep distance from now on.

As for Abbie…she was beautiful….God…she was gorgeous. Dean knew that she missed him and knew how much she needed him….she was not only alone, but lonely and unsatisfied. He remembered last night. He couldn't sleep again… so he was just lying in the bed as he heard a slight moan from the other side. He turned around to face her. Abbie was sleeping, but not peacefully at all… There was a strange look on her face. His first guess was that she was having a nightmare, but that thought soon faded away as he heard her moan out his name. Dean knew that kind of noise coming out of her mouth all too well… He hadn't heard it in a while… She was slightly shaking, as it seemed from pleasure. Dean couldn't help, but let his eyes travel down her body. Abbie was breathing heavily – her full breasts with now harden nipples tempting him. He would love to take one of them in his mouth, running his tongue over it. He would love to feel the so welcoming heat between her legs taking him again. He knew that he was hard….he tried to just shook it off as he turned on the other side again, squeezing his eyes closed and hoping that the sleep will come soon.

Dean decided that he had enough of a work out for today. He grabbed the bottle of water and took a sip from it. Then he just went up the stairs and out of the basement. The picture that exposed in front of him as he entered the living room made his head spin. Roman and Abbie. Kissing. Their bodies were so close to each other. His hands were all over her…She was kissing him back… He waited for the sudden wave of anger to fade away. As he calmed himself as much as it was possible with that view in front of him, he coughed, clarifying his presence in the room. They pulled apart.

\- Dean… - Abbie was the first one to speak. – I…we…just…

\- Had a make out session? I got that one. No need to explain.

\- Dean…it was my fault. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have kissed her. – Roman joined in as well. But Dean didn't know what to say. There was nothing to say. Of course it wasn't Roman's fault and hell it wasn't Abbie's fault for sure. It was all his fault. He was the one, acting like an asshole and neglecting his wife's needs. Dean just nodded his head and made his way to the couch, sitting there and staring at the space in front of him.

Abbie looked at Roman.

\- I think it would be the best if you just go. I will call you later.

Roman nodded, heading towards the door. He took one last glance at his friend before he went out.

Abbie looked at Dean. She didn't know what to say or do. She felt awful right now. It was just an instinct to kiss Roman back. She hasn't felt anyone's lips on hers for a long time and she just had to do it. Of course the feeling of kissing Roman was so different. Even though it wasn't their first kiss. It was something unknown for her, something she hadn't used to. Roman wasn't Dean and that's what scared her most during the kiss.

\- Dean…I think we need to talk. – She whispered and made her way to the couch, sitting next to her husband. He didn't react at all. Dean just continued to stare somewhere in the space. – Will you please look at me? - Nothing. Abbie felt anger building inside of her. – Look at me, God damn it! – Abbie almost yelled the last sentence. Dean turned his head to look at her. She obviously caught his attention. His eyes weren't cold or angry as she expected them to be. They were sad. Abbie started to say something. She wanted to apologize even though she knew it wasn't enough, it wasn't going to change anything. But Dean cut her off.

\- No need to explain anything. It's not your fault. It's not Roman's fault. It's all my fault. I made you miserable. I made you suffer. And I hate myself for it. – He said quietly as he put his head in his hands. – I'm so sorry, Abbie. So fucking sorry…

\- Dean…it's…

\- No! Don't tell me it's okay! Because it's not. I'm a horrible person. A horrible husband. A horrible father. But I can't do anything about it… it's genetically determined to be a bad father. Dea will be so much better without me… she'll be happy growing up without me. Roman…he'll be the best for her and for you…so you are free…to just go to him and have the life you and Dea really deserve.

\- You were afraid of being a bad father? You were distant, because of your fear? – Abbie asked surprised. Dean slightly nodded. – God, Dean… you will be a great father if you just give it a shot. You can't just run away, because you are scared. You have to fight your fear. That's how you are. You are a fighter…and I fell in love with you… It's not Roman we need. It's you. I love you.

Dean looked at her in disbelieve.

\- You love me…after all this shit I put you through and you still love me?

\- It's going to take a lot to make me stop loving you. – Abbie smiled as she put her left hand on Dean's cheek. He took her hand in one of his and brought it to his mouth, gently kissing it.

\- I love you too. – He whispered, looking her straight in the eyes. Abbie remembered how much she missed his kisses, his touch…his eyes.

\- God…I missed your beautiful eyes…. – She whispered. Dean smiled widely.

\- Dea…she has my eyes, right?

\- Not only your eyes, Dean…your hair…even your smile…she looks so much like you…. –Abbie got up from the couch and pull him up by his hand, smiling. – Come with me. Come and meet your daughter.

Abbie took him to where the baby chair was. Dea was still sitting, kicking around with her little feet. When she saw them she fixed her gaze on her father as from her mouth came out a happy sound. She reached out her tiny hand for Dean.

\- What…what does she want?

\- She wants you to touch her…. – Abbie whispered. Dean swallowed hard and reached out his shaking hand to his daughter. Dea caught his thumb, squeezing it hard.

\- She's strong – he chuckled and gently run his index finger over her tiny wrist. – And…God…so soft…

Dea blinked and shook his finger. That was it. His daughter touched not only his hand, but his heart also…changing him. Dean looked over Abbie and brought her closer to his body with his free hand.

\- I love you…I love both of you… - He whispered as he kissed the top of his wife's head, inhaling her scent….God…he missed her.

Dea yawned. Abbie looked at her and smiled…

\- It looks like someone is sleepy. – She said as she picked up her daughter. – I'm going to put her to bed.

Dean nodded.

\- I'll be here.

Abbie went back upstairs, taking care for her daughter. Dea surely was a sleep was fast asleep.

In a few minutes Abbie was back down. Dean was sitting on the couch, thinking about something. She sat next to him and looked at him.

\- I missed you. – He whispered. Something strange ran over Abbie's face. – What? What are you thinking about?

\- Do you still want me? Do you still think I'm attractive?

\- Abbie… of course…how could I not want you….You are gorgeous. – Dean remembered last night, when Abbie was having a dirty dream… Just the thought made him go hard all over again. He took her hand and placed it on his crotch. – Here…you can feel how much attracted to you I actually am.

He moaned as he felt her hand rubbing him through his trousers.

\- I missed you, Abbie… - he whispered. – Let me show you how much I missed you.

Dean picked her up and placed her on the floor next to the couch. He took off his t-shirt and captured her lips in a hungry kiss, pressing his body into hers. He untied her bathrobe, throwing it to a side. A husky growl came out of his mouth at the sight of her naked breast. He took one of her nipples in his mouth, gently running his tongue over it. The feeling of his lips made her shiver…a slight moan escaped from Abbie's mouth. Her hands find her way to his trousers again, unzipping them. He helped her to take them off and kissed her lips once again. Dean groaned as he felt Abbie's hand stroke him. He moved his lips to her neck, sucking it and gently biting it, which brought another moan, this time louder, out of her mouth. His lips moved down her body, giving their attention to her breasts, down her stomach, reaching her sensitive area. She almost screamed in pleasure as she felt his tongue on her clit. God…that was heaven. She buried her hands in his messy hair, moaning out his name. He slide one finger into her, while his mouth was still working on her clit. Abbie felt herself tightening and soon her first orgasm for the night shook her body.

\- Dean…. Take me…I want to feel you inside of me… - Abbie moaned. He didn't wait for a second call. Dean placed himself between her legs, feeling her so welcoming heat. He groaned and sunk into her core. He started moving inside of her as she wrapped her legs around his waist. Soon Abbie started meeting his thrust. He knew he wouldn't last much longer after all these months without sex. His fingers found her clit again, rubbing it, while he continued to thrust into her. A loud moan escaped her lips. Dean felt her tightening around his member.

\- Yes, baby, come for me. – He whispered in her ear, nibbling at it. That totally sent her over the edge. Another orgasm ripped out her body. Feeling her shaking underneath him, Dean couldn't keep it anymore. He also let his orgasm out, unloading his seed deep inside of her. It took them a few minutes to catch their breaths.

\- I love you. – Abbie whispered as she laid her head on his chest. After ten minutes of just lying there, she added: – Never do this to me again…I don't know how I survived without sex these few months.

\- I'm asking myself exactly the same thing….I'm so sorry… - Dean whispered back. A devilish grin appeared on his face. – Let me make it up to you…

He placed himself between her thighs again.

\- Dean! – She laughed and brought his face closer to hers. – I love you!

\- I love you too, baby. Now don't fight it. I know you want it. Just let me take you to heaven again.

With that he kissed her deeply and let her heat take him in. God if she only knew how much he loved her. Dean just couldn't exist without Abbie. He realized that these few months. And now that he knew it there was no way of letting her go. That was for sure.


End file.
